top of page
  • Writer's pictureJOY A COLLURA

What is an arrow without its bow?


This site is for in-depth discussion and education, (e.g. Lessons Learned, Entrapment Avoidance) for adults 18 years and older. Anyone under 18 should have parental approval to be on this site. We are unable to govern who comes to the site. We can gather analytics to protect the integrity of the site.

What is an arrow without its bow?

The potential of the bow lays stagnant without that arrow, vice versa ...

May it be for hunting or for a 'cupid moment' or ...

just for gathering data

and looking at it all

(reflecting back on the 10+ years)

and scratching my head,

why one firefighter-

before he died

told me what he did,

and I went to that nearby city and asked that kids boss one year ago (Sept. 2022)

some tough comments/questions

and all he could say

"how could you know that"

and I explained...

-???an oath was broken, apparently???-

He said that information was to be taken to all their graves.

I should not know that information.

Hmmm...well, in a sense, that young kid is not here


This site is for in-depth discussion and education, (e.g. Lessons Learned, Entrapment Avoidance) for adults 18 years and older. Anyone under 18 should have parental approval to be on this site. We are unable to govern who comes to the site. We can gather analytics to protect the integrity of the site.

Now, I am unsure,

if I am the bow or the arrow?

or both.

We have established

by the public records/FOIAs and the Helm BS,

I have been the target, right?!

A tsunami of bullsh[__] was thrown my way

over ten plus years-

-most damage of that storm was swooped back-channel.-


Why did those folks feel they had to build an unsafe environment to the eyewitness versus be relieved on one of the biggest fire fatalities in Wildland History there were people on those Weavers documenting the weekend.

Why the disrespect?

I read the Helm (YHF13') lawsuit claim and all the claims including the family claims, so please understand why I feel bewildered...



This site is for in-depth discussion and education, (e.g. Lessons Learned, Entrapment Avoidance) for adults 18 years and older. Anyone under 18 should have parental approval to be on this site. We are unable to govern who comes to the site. We can gather analytics to protect the integrity of the site.

I mean look at the very question when the lead Yarnell Hill Fire 2013 investigator said at the safety / risk management conference I attended- the 2023 San Diego Risk Management Training Conference 'any comments, feedback, or snarky remarks?' after his presentation and I said sure, such and such time you said you did successful investigation interviews, yet I never met you in 2013 for any interview and I was with the GMHS on the Weavers June 30, 2013 and on the Weavers all weekend ???

I was disregarded and ignored- how come???

I am speaking documented truths.

I deserved an answer.



Bill Bondshu, email said inApril 2023- 'Assistant Chief, CA-OES Fire & Rescue Division', shushed one of the longest running United States Forest Service bosses (Sup) when he retired when after I made my comment- this retired USFS Superintendent went to make his comment- the presentation ended immediately with a very influential person being hushed...why??? that is truly telling too, folks.

By him ignoring me

and I state documented facts

then I am one person

along with Sonny

who he did not interview

so that makes his statement untrue, right???

He failed to have any successful interview

or any interview with us at all-

which our accounts were quite significant.


How many other lies or omissions has he possibly been a part to ???

It is a good question that deserves answers.


and it does not add up ...

all I have learned ...

and how hard it is

to have to be cautious how I express myself.

Many layers, many omissions.

Many who rather lock to

"glazed" narratives


the truth--


This site is for in-depth discussion and education, (e.g. Lessons Learned, Entrapment Avoidance) for adults 18 years and older. Anyone under 18 should have parental approval to be on this site. We are unable to govern who comes to the site. We can gather analytics to protect the integrity of the site.

Remember folks, this one thing, if you dislike my came here on your own account/accord and you made/make the energy to watch/read me/my posts.

If you dislike my content, then leave.

This post and all my post have a disclaimer ...

and right now, I am sharing that below may get very sensitive for some- possibly even many, but I almost died June 30, 2013, so I am going to discuss it ...

If you are under 18, you should have parental

approval to even be on our site because we write about areas needing "solutions" that are important versus allowing the glazed narrative to remain.

so leave now especially if you are a "snowflake".

I am free to be me...

Constitutional Right, it is...

and feel free to comment after... post factual constructive comments only.

Only comments ever deleted are ones of hate, harm and hurt. Those get filed onto a harassment file I have with the analytics of who said one comes to the site without me knowing who you are and how long you are spending here. It is all documented for my protection and "freedom of rights"...


This site is for in-depth discussion and education, (e.g. Lessons Learned, Entrapment Avoidance) for adults 18 years and older. Anyone under 18 should have parental approval to be on this site. We are unable to govern who comes to the site. We can gather analytics to protect the integrity of the site.

I spent some time Summer 2023 reviewing

the box canyon images Sonny and I were at June 30, 2013, morning where we argued and later learned that late afternoon 19 firefighters died.

Looking at the Fire Shelter and PPE images in the order the SAIT SAIR page 88 gave us- they don't make sense especially with the documents I found from Yavapai County Sheriff's Office

(post is 574 days old yet still where we are now ???-what are we teaching our children because I speak and write documented facts especially when it involves Higher Authorities).

I mean, I have the recording of Tom Harbour and what he tells the Mormon Youth- it does not match page 88 of the SAIT-SAIR. Tom, why do that to our Youth?

I think it deserves answers.

In over ten years- still

unsure who this is in photo:

please let me know,

if you for sure know---

no guesses.

It matters to me if the above image is for sure, _____.

I do not know all the 'day to day' looks of the men

and details to the men

just what family members shared to me and the media.

Prepped my space to look at what the SAIT SAIR and John Dougherty of InvestigativeMEDIA offered the public:

Mom, don't mind the dust on the plant, please...

the yellow highlighted areas are the images I taped to my armoire to see the Fire Shelters and PPE images--- I noted the fire behavior was worse for certain numbers and we never really talk about come? I would like to know how I almost died June 30, 2013, but 19 did. Right!?

  1. 3. Clayton Whitted

  2. 13. Garret Zuppiger

  3. 14. Scott Norris

  4. 16. William Warneke

This is the only name

on the PPE / Fire Shelter Inspection notes

that they write "no photos" for:

7. Travis Turbyfill

yet why weren't the above four names

also to state "no photos" as well

since there were zero labelled images for those men just numbers 5, 8,17,18???

Why was Turbyfill isolated on that paper to say "no photos" but no one else--- I ask based on other data I own...

it bothers me, Frank and Mike.

Doesn't it bother you both?

and why did they label numbers as if they belong to what GMHS? see:

and why were there a ...301/302 number? is that another area we should know the answers too?

So, they were certain 3,13,14,16 of page 88 SAIT SAIR belonged to those numbers ---why not Turbyfill?

Why state "no photos" yet YCSO took into inventory the items they did and wrote the words 'possibly' and two Granite Mountain Hotshot names??? Hmmm...

I would hope one day they answer those questions...

We deserve to know why the paper trail ended in the public records there. Right!?

How come, YCSO?


symbol of peace

sent to all of us

this Fall 2023:

Baby doves in my backyard.

As one of my lawyers said--- what they like about me is I am not in this for monies --- and like I tell them and you all ...where I am going, I cannot take monies, yet I can take with me that I have lived my life in truth and with integrity.

There is an art to releasing --- begins with telling the truth.

I know when I pass on, I hold the facts and truths and lived life such way ... been offered "high dollars" to do a fillum and book ... but all I ever wanted from all this was that our lives matter. Tell it in truth not "sound bites" or glazed narratives to make the trauma lessen and possibly seem a certain way.

Except folks who investigated and were on that fire as well-


I was on the Weavers with Sonny that fateful day.

Remember us?!

I was never going to allow the narrative to just stay glazed.

I was/am gonna bring the facts out so you should have been upfront from the start...right!?

Here we had the InvestigativeMEDIA participant, highly credentialed, Gary L. Olson, who taunted me and labelled me a "tease" for giving out data or lack of as he possibly gaspingly waited all these years and felt I failed more than likely him or others but all along I was really alone on this dangerous path knowing who I was up against because I held in data in hopes the people who should, would...

It is not my role- my role was to gather the facts.

When Dr Ted Putnam, Keegan Schafer, Norb Szczurek, Fred J. Schoeffler were at my home- when they saw what I shared- Fred said do you know you have a gold mine here in public records/FOIAs.

I had to move all my stuff away from my property because of his comment.

I have no idea who are happy little moles in all this are...

Too many and at times even myself - we have shown disrespect and lack of honor to a man who also spent a lonely path speaking truth to Power; Fred J. Schoeffler.

Thank you, sir, for the ten plus years of allowing me to gain knowledge through your eyes and path being around those in the fire industry.

I said I am uninterested to place the documents out

back in March 2018.

I said I would make a "live" journaling blog where he can take my PRR/FOIA images and make articles for the world, the Public at Large.

That is how this blog was born, June 26, 2018.

Gary, I did my share and then some...

just for the record

with my full name


an avatar like many used...

plus, it is most likely not too hard to disappoint ya ;)

I know I did more than most involved that day.

I am not in this to hurt or harm those who know more...

They have to make the choice to do the difficult right thing.

They know I know, Gary.

That makes every action I do...harder than the last.


one of my top memories

in the past 10 plus years

were also one of my worst ones...

July 17, 2021, Scottie E. Briggs

created a Facebook account

under a fiction name

so I could have a separate account

from Fred

because I am uninterested

(always will be)

in Social Media

yet Fred kept speaking to Scottie on the matter.

Scottie just wants everyone to get along.

Not one person can rob me

of the beautiful memory

I had Tuesday, July 20th, 2021 at 2:42 PM

until sh[__] ...until that person got in their ears;

I am glad God shared that to my life---

it will never be again

because it ain't my style

but incredible spontaneous moment happened

during a time I was very weak

and ill and with extreme pains...

Thank you to the dispatchers who gave me crucial documents.

You all understood I just wanted to learn how I almost died...

I would have done this all even if the 19 didn't die.

So yeah,

if anyone can tell me

who that firefighter is above---

I would like to know that answer.

Attune to God,

listen to your gut feeling,

and speak truth...

not your truth but the pure truth...

I have seen what some of your truths sounded like...

including the "trash talking" about me....sigh.

I forgive you though.

In closing...The Violin Padawan:

When my time to pass on happens

and with my health declining ---

some may feel relieved to see that moment

because I showed documented facts

to people in power positions

and was fully disregarded

by too many

from the YHF13' people,

lawyers/political publicists/media afraid to touch this---

too many were fixated on just 19 when YHF13' was much more than that...there was more than 19 lives that ended up being affected and died on the aftermath of the fire...

I can tell you if I passed today,

it will be more from a broken heart

on how Donna Gordon was handled

even though I have so many health concerns

to be probably be the real reason.

Lord, may the people we connect with and love...

may they find solace both seen and unseen

and embrace change.

Focus on happiness during the brokenness...

As I said 10 plus years..."speak up"...

it matters/mattered.

I know you know I know....

it's okay.

I forgive all...

Those who still after ten years

think I am a nobody



to the Yarnell Hill Fire 2023---

as the eyewitness...

who documented the most June 30, 2013, and thereafter...

Tell that to the lawyers

trying to figure out how this should


It is sensitive...

I almost died a few times...

so people,

it is not easy for sure.

The truth needs to be known

so it does not repeat itself.

I am going to keep being my true authentic self.

Certain people want me to move on ...

I am not here to manipulate the data like I seen others do...

I am here to show one the documented facts.

Remember that, when listening to others about me-

They most likely manipulate to get their results.

They throw shade on me.

Ask yourself why?

I accomplish my goals moving forward.

I show up and show out in this world.

I lay low and just do what I do...

I am in my personal journaling space sharing.

You do not see me in their space writing-

I am in my space here.

You do not see me out in social medias spewing ill perceptions...or trying to create an audience of oh me the victim role we more than likely often see from some.

I am here showing you the documents so you

can take data to lead to a conclusion.

You do not see me making possible

fairy tale movies and books for a buck.

I never once made souvenir gear on the fire I almost died on but 19 did to then say "hey y'all...t-shirt sales" time again...

You do not see me spreading it to the people God shows me.

I share it in my space and on my page with Disclaimers to refrain from coming here if you cannot handle the proof is in the pudding.

Much defamation and slander has been done my way but

I rise above it and keep getting the facts out.

I separate myself from those others lies and omissions and continued over a decade secretly discussing how to suppress me even further than the known "shadow banning".

I am the truth.

Always will be.

This site is for in-depth discussion and education, (e.g. Lessons Learned, Entrapment Avoidance) for adults 18 years and older. Anyone under 18 should have parental approval to be on this site. We are unable to govern who comes to the site. We can gather analytics to protect the integrity of the site.

Mami 'WT' says it right, folks:

Here is her take about my situation and my replies in green-

Joy, if you get the right people who could show the gang stalking to the slander done on you - the need to orchestrate/create people to dislike you - why?

--- if the right authorities took a look at those folks than you will see some real answers. Do they know what you know? Bigger question, right.

my reply: I mean, it does not add up we were at a July 2013 community meeting and Todd Abel failed to promptly do an assigned task and us hikers did it for him-

Had Todd did his task quickly we never would have done all this documentation.

It was his failure to get those 'No Trespassing' signs to the area the public records show he was assigned to do and being in front of a broken-hearted man hearing his broken heart that is when our interest grew stronger.

Thank you, Todd Abel for that failure because it brought us to realize this is a cross generational thing on so many levels as I learned from a Prescott leader last Fall 2022---

I plan to speak it in documented facts. You all may project opinions on me, but you never met me--- but it sounds in step to the normal orchestrated bs---right?!


Joy, we watched you overcome one cycle after another in over a decade- complete one cycle of antagonization from somebody and then here comes another person and they come in all different directions.

We at first believed them but we thank you for always for your journal so we can learn the process you faced.

These folks are still doing everything they can possibly do under the Sun and under the moon to ruin your reputation and you see it, but you stay there just in the light showing us what you face. You refrain from going to them and attacking. That is refreshening to watch how much you rely on God and His plan for you.

My reply: How can one attack created falsehoods that feel they have such entitlement to not allow people the freedom to share their story.

I share mine with documented facts, folks.

I listen to the rubbish, but it is their rubbish and eventually people catch on and fade off from their original belief based on others orchestrating and possibly forcing it in their face or remain possibly in fear they don't want the same treatment I saw done to them but either way they caught on as it has been told to me.

I recently watched a decent fillum in August 2023 get taken down

and saw that happen and thought how those folks can feel so at ease to remove something done from the heart...

I would question those board members intentions...really I would and have...I think it is a shame.

I question how one could even have that entitlement emotion to express to the board members such concerns- and actually successfully have it removed immediately.

Why are people being blocked to share their experiences?

One cannot fathom the stuff I own in records. Overwhelming- Fred, the lawyers and others have told me.

I could have been a wirey a[__]hole and just released it all but I am doing my best to show it with much grace and integrity as possible because it's ugly; the truth, folks.

You for sure do not see me out creating alliances ...

I just follow God's plan.

My ladies group and family/friends for sure know that and people reading the blog and send me feedback know that.

But others waste their time to alert the world that people are to only follow the SAIT SAIR in regard to Yarnell Hill Fire 2013 and turn a deaf ear to the woman who was with the GMHS on the Weaver Mountains, June 30, 2013, and documented as much as I own. ???

I am alive - they are not so I will place out all I can on the matter how come I almost died but 19 did.

Well Joy, getting back to the matter at hand ... because in their minds if they can show that she cool with ____ again -people think there's something wrong with you, Joy, but people are hip to what is really going on and they are feeling like how can they help you Joy?

My reply: Prayer. It works. All through the day just pray the nonsense stops and we band together to figure a solution...I am for getting the facts out and a solution---I am uninterested in the over ten years of gossip- God will in His time handle all who did the gossip, participated in it, listened to it and did not due their due diligence and etc...

We get it, Joy. Sorry you faced this. nobody is believing that you are the bad terrible evil person that's antagonizing these folks as they claim. They recognize what is happening here.

My reply: People recognize that when someone "gossips" it is usually the person spreading it that needs a look at---

I lay low just placing the documents do not see me calling any of them up to be pals but always here to work this out with them; solutions. However, they had ten years to do they have to do a mediation with my legal team on their dollar. I am uninterested knowing what I know.

We get it, Joy. They have been attacking / antagonizing you, so they now appear silly teaming up together to make it seem as if you're the problem - there's a whole hell of a lot of people who now know that you are not the problem but they back at it again those folks. When will it stop?

My reply: Either the time I become some random a[__]hole and drop names and get it flowing or keep to God's plan and according to Him he has told me to even stop thoughts like that because He is working in all their lives to bring them closer to Him...and then in turn things will happen in His time and His Way.

Okay, Joy. I guess we get frustrated because we want it all ... natural human thing ... the thing is they want to build an army against you to hate on you. why? You were the eyewitness. I do not like to see that.

My reply: Me either. God assures me one person who spoke falsehoods when I spoke truths is now in love with my tenacity: possibly me. S[___], if I was single, they would court me because they know I fit every check box in their mental on what they look for in a person except my poor health that has messed my flesh up royally. They dislike that part. But yeah, there will be an ebb & flow when building alliances and towers will crumble if the foundation was agenda driven and away from God's plan which is T R U T H...Think about it...they created / orchestrate the numbers against me - why? All it does in the end is prove my case that we all should be free to share our YHF13' experiences fully. Not live in fear of these folks.

Joy. what they have done against you- they tried to ruin your life, your name, your way of life. What is your take on that?

My reply: God will handle every one of them. Be cautious of your words. Words have a way of mattering... some who wished death on me, happened to someone close on them, one told me.

If one has to "gossip" on me over ten years later to create new generational audiences, God assures me they all will eventually see the truth. No reason to react or interact. Seems sadder to waste precious time that way--- but that is their lives. I seek zero justice in court rooms but in the hearts of folks to know God. Balance that justice in our hearts is what I seek. I doubt with what I own they even want me in a court room again. Right!?

Joy, they got almost the whole Community and then some were on their side and thinking that you were some sort of Hellion - some sort of issue in their life that needed to be possibly destroyed.

They really had these people going at one point, but people know now that you are the sun -Justice - they know that you've been being Guided by God. They know that you do the difficult right thing that you are in harmony& you are Divinely protected by God. They see who is on the right side of things- the scales truly have been balancing in your favor with who matters.

God is on your side that's what they're saying too and these other people in this community know that [ __ ] -some of these people want to possibly make up with you to show you love but they'll be exposing themselves because they know how observant you are.

My reply: The community's emotions were played with by these folks - I know they caught on when I began to tell the documented facts on DONNA GORDON - it was truly when people were "awakened" how we need the people in authority to be looked at, finally.

I have been shown from people in the community who was a part of that "other" area once and they are traumatized how deep this has gone to me the truth teller.

I say stay in joy and what you cannot comprehend, release it to God and just focus to the documented facts versus illusions / delusions of others.

They were here to distract. Some really know I know because certain entities know because they gave it to me.

They know I even asked the FBI to get involved.

Joy, some already know they need to cut off and a lot of these people have done that because once again the truth was proven about who you were despite what these folks said about you and again some of these same individuals

in this community who at one point was on this "create hate" team against you and was trying to make your life hard have since had a change in direction and have put forth efforts to defend your name...they have communicated things to defend you to ensure that you're able to move forward without all of this scheming and plotting that was being done against you. Some left because they learned some they know who know me saw the documented behind the scenes and they are left fumbling should I leave the country---what should I do is their thoughts---I just cannot look Joy in the face or the world or work things out with her.

My reply: There is only one person I had expected to work things out with back in 2021, yet I have zero wealth and can only offer until the day I died a platonic friendship and so it is what it is, the rest of you I am on pause in 2023 and re-evaluate in 2024. That brutal assault, I am still recovering from the swelling is enough to keep me hidden away because I don't even recognize me...I do the work to get well though. That we know.

Lies and manipulation were told about me. That is on their heart not mine. I know it is undeniable I was chosen to be on those Weaver Mountains with Tex Harold Eldon Gilligan (Sonny) by God that weekend in June, 2013.

What we learned -there are "tricksters" in this aftermath to distract and be deceitful...shame on them...The sad part were the narratives that placed me in a court room and also attempted to go after me falsely; criminally- that attempt in 2021-2022...sad, sad, sad. Especially knowing what I know. Very sad.

You know one is in stalemate - when a birth of new folks are being influenced since the last rounds failed for the most part. Right?! You may get a few on board ... or a few too many but not my concern. God assures me I am doing what He asked of me.

If you read my disclaimers, then we are all adults here.

Be one that follows the Constitution-and let people be free.

Do you know my father's lifestyle had him choose a life of sitting on his patio after the hustle of his work day, quiet moments, reflecting back (overthinking) as he drank his beers and at times more so than not--- had his smokes of his choice and you know what he said to me, "Joy, you never judged me ... you always kept it real with me ... you were always just present ... you nurtured at the right pace for me when family would label me - you defended me and stuck at my side; thank you for being my kid" --- I looked at him like did I have a choice- right!?

These naysayers and haters have a choice. Be a part of the change and solution or stop coming here just to create discords in others lives. I will pray for you. Some just have an obsession to suppress others LIVES, yet we all matter, to tell our YHF13' accounts freely and openly.



bottom of page