• Arizona Desert Walker Joy A. Collura and

Part 4 of 5 - Underneath every simple, obvious story about ‘human error,’ there is a deeper, more co

Part 4 of 5 - Underneath every simple, obvious story about ‘human error,’ there is a deeper, more complex story - a story about the system in which people work. Will these formerly unrevealed public records change the account of what occurred on June 30, 2013?

Views expressed to "the public at largeand "of public concern"

DISCLAIMER: Please fully read the front page of the website (link below) before reading any of the posts ( )

The authors and the blog are not responsible for misuse, reuse, recycled and cited and/or uncited copies of content within this blog by others. The content even though we are presenting it public if being reused must get written permission in doing so due to copyrighted material. Our sincerest apologies for the delays. These posts were due out in August 2019 yet we had website research a matter, and we are now finally able to rebuild the pages and make them "live." This extensive post may offend some due to the time of the year, however, we must stay the course to release information because more is yet to come out in future posts. To avoid such offense to some, please avoid further reading the posts until you find a proper reflective time for yourself. I did ask many people who were affected by this tragic Yarnell Hill Fire event and they said it was okay to post it this weekend. I know some people would not want any of this out at any time, yet I also know too many for "mental health" reasons need this out ASAP. Again - please avoid reading any further if you are unable to handle "sensitive material." Thank you.

I am closing out the Part 4 of 5 post with some of my personalized journey of the Summer 2019, blending in never-seen-before June 30, 2013, fire photos, (e.g. the Rosewind Fire in Yarnell and its documentation, The Washington D.C. tourist and Applied Human Factor and Ergonomics (AHFE) Conference photos, discussions about author John MacLean and his Investigation Team, GMHS Steed and other GMHS WFs on the two-track road on that morning, 2019 California Interagency Wildland Fire Risk Management Conference in Shelter Island with retired FF Tom Sherman, and the 2020 USFS Women in Fire (WIWF) program.

Before I left for D.C. this Summer 2019, I spent time with my wildlife buddies (the elk a.k.a. My Defensible Space helpers :0) - laying on the soil) just enjoying another day, and then on I went to Washington D.C.:

One elk, I call "Buddy", was like you are going where ??? What? I left a few sad by such news ...

It was really good to spend time with my medical massagers in between chiropractor appointments in which I am officially now on the maintenance schedule versus two to three times a week - yahoo :-)

Dee Sickles

I went to visit family and friends -

My brother Paul and I at DeFalco's Italian Deli in Scottsdale, Arizona the night before I flew out to D.C. - not feeling well at all (swollen up /edema) - yet remained staying the course.

The day before our AHFE presentation - My brother Bill (photo above) and my niece and nephew (photo above), Mom (photo after Niece and Nephew) and another AHFE Member (no photo) at Tony and Joe's

Highly recommend Fiola Mare - Top Notch Experience - Fine Food and Fine Company

And I also spent time with my hubby and pets

(husband in above photo)

When I visited my hubby, as he always enjoys to sneak me a piece of pizza because my environment is Gluten-Free :-( so I always enjoy how he also sneaks me in a snack size MILKY WAY®MIDNIGHT MINI for my backpack :-). I am so blessed and appreciative of how much my family supports my current journey, and how they will do anything to make sure I have the space and time to do what I need to do. I am now pausing my "housewife hiker" moniker to figure out what happened on June 30, 2013, and to make sure leaders of the Wildland Fire Industry shares correctly and truthfully, my account of what occurred on that tragic weekend.

If you are perceiving me based on John Norman MacLean's Presentation

at Smokejumper Conference(s) or other presentations, then first,

I want to take the time to present who I am first hand by each "-hyphen-" below will show

more about me and my life history and who I knew and know ...I will be transparent as you read my five posts and in hopes that the people in the last 18 minutes before the men died begin to do the same may it be by contacting me anonymously or on your own blog-

but here I am:

-Yes, I do have a husband (not Sonny) (the man in photo above) - met in 88', dated in 91', married in 93' - What? 31 yrs with me? "oh my". 26.5yrs married? Yes. Did that match up close to anything John Norman MacLean stated at that Smokejumper Conference presentation? Ugh. Nope.

-Yes. Another huge rumor has always been do I even walk because I am stout so how did I ever get the Desert Walker label. Locals labelled me that long ago. I have been unhealthy for a very long time yet I always made exercise a strong priority. January 2018 to present I have been more academics and training and no real hikes or exercise at all (hence the fluctuation of weight and edema concerns), the following were my church youth pastor Ben P. and church buddies and my first boyfriend ever (Jack 87-Nov89') and Bruce, Lesa, and Jack and I were a good group and it is Jack who got me into biking and the love of the outdoors- Jack even over three decades later has me in his desk drawer, see us:

(1988-2009) I did long distance endurance bicycling, (1986, 1988, 1990, 1994, 1998, 2000) Running/Walking/Hiking/Climbing all my life but long distance (2006-2017). (1988-1990) "base" alternative -basket toss, roundabout, advanced dismounts, tumbling advance loads, Stunt Cheerleader. (1989,1992) 1940/1950 Dancing, (1991) 50's Dancing Bloomfield, NJ (Kaja Whitehouse; prior co-worker and I danced and hung out with John (Todd's friend John not my John) and Todd W. appx a month (Spring 91') he said -it was not Kaja's BF but mine and wanted his name as just "TW" for here but I said nah Todd W. it stays- I think that is the shortest I ever knew anyone)(Anthony D. and his daughter Lianna Summer 91' - Gold's gym phase), Loads of Club Dancing - Seaside Heights Clubs with FBI fella Rich K. (he had the best mom - movie critic- that took me to her viewings (deceased) and Lisa D. and co-worker Lee (91'), (1993-1994) Sport Rollerblading.(1988-1999) Denise Austin TV/DVD Exercise Regimen. (1985-1996) TV fitness shows ‘Bodies in Motion’ and ‘Basic Training the Workout’ with Gilad Janklowicz. Early 2000s rock climbs and hike with mom's husband's friend, Stanley B., and for the love of playing baseball - 1989 to 1990 will always mark one of the saddest parts yet highlights to my life where it was the batting cages in Seaside Heights, NJ and in loving memory Arlene Q. who lived on Green Valley Drive - died at 50 (Dec 16 95'). I miss our talks. Best lady out there. I bring her up because I make mention in post 5 that Toms River NJ had its chemical clusters but so did Lakewood/Jackson areas had something "environmental" ... as well her husband died (Metuchen,NJ) in 81' at age 46. Their kids are two of the best out there but with life we faded off knowing another. I remember "clearly" the pains and silence Arlene's son faced in losing his dad so young and how many times did we listen over and over and over to U2( ).

How many times I think to that batting cage phase so much that it helps me to stay the course for the GMHS kids and all affected by the YH Fire. At times people ask me how come I can be so cold to the GMHS families and never reach out to them or do this blog and what I am doing. First off, I know many of the GMHS loved ones and friends - the ones that want to know me. I asked how do they define being cold? They went on to tell me I keep bringing up Yarnell Hill Fire and they want it to be remembered a certain locked way. I have to tell you world - fairy-tales are great if makes you warm and fuzzy but too many have been and still are affected by the Yarnell Hill Fire. And it's their stories that need to be told.

For those affected, we need the facts to the front. I know some out there have not only locally and county and the world and through their presentations did their best to slander me or give me a label "Crazy Congress" woman and to date the only person I have on audio doing such and telling a Wildland Firefighter (with clout) is Bob Brandon. I have not been able to fact check if he is the originator, but indeed he is part of the slanderous ill opinion label about me - because why? Maybe because he felt I did not belong to his fire department ( as he stated in this recording here: ) so he did not have to give me public records as he says on a prior blog post? Come on. Bob, you have to remember July and August 2013 the very words you muttered locally about Shrine Road to so many including me you spoke to at Kimberly Leroy's place when you were making an assessment as I was doing the Flippens land. Really? I am glad you took that trauma and rebuilt so many homes as I watched you, yet you still have a duty and owe it to the world not a few folks the real views off Shrine Road versus some article of the spooks and scares and oh my the smoke did what to your health? 19 men are dead, sir. No good or bad health for those 19, just people they know having to move forward because so many refuse to talk about it in true form that were there. And many more have died since the YH Fire. People need to speak up.

After you read post 1 through 5 and you want to hold on to the label "Crazy Congress Woman" - go for it, but I am not. I am very direct and real though. Please avoid telling me you are gonna do something if you say you are going to do it but than hide away - I had a person tell me direct this is the year he was for sure going to help me but last we spoke was after Washington D.C. and I never did a thing to the man - nothing - and it is like he vanished except some inserts of disappointment of the Fall 2019 California fires to my blog contributor, But to me it is as if he can only take on what is in his current situation because he is in a virtual "hornet's nest" and he is dealing with internal and external stuff from all the fire fatalities that occurred and much more plus - He named me a "friend" this year and last year - a very very long and decorated man in the Fire Industry. That really means something to me.

I would like to know what a definition of a friend is ... I only know very few in my life daily for many decades - and it does take us all to do this not just InvestigativeMEDIA contributors or me keep digging and presenting just to have media, authors and journalists, and PhDs take my content I present publicly and make their own narratives and articles and books and presentations or using IM the same way as they have done me. On July 22nd 3:42pm, he texted "hope we all see how much we all mean to each other" .... then July 24 4:25pm when heading to Washington D.C. the text went to "be careful! Good Luck!" ... then I was not going to present because I have a very difficult time being around authoritarians like my co-author. I wanted to rehearse first since it is my first presentation in the big city of Washington D.C. and he wanted to eat. I was at 9:26am on July 25th uneased about the presentation. This man wrote us at 9:27am when my blog contributor involved him for some odd reason - hoping he can help me stay the course and he wrote back "...Remember who you guys are as a team. This is important work. I look at you guys as family." ... then on 26th 10:21am "...You guys have come too far to let anything deflect what you both have built." ...

There was much activities to our lives all around in August that by August 18 1:37pm when he said "I am full of sadness and pain I'd like to share ... people are despicable ..." .... then it slowly began to fade on his end for communication as we began to get hit health wise for me, and Spiritual Warfare wise for all and I was about done with not being home my normal schedule- I was going mad thinking "when" will I see 2 y.o. Grace and 9 y.o. Annie again ... seem so long. By the end of August, I kept hearing about Donut from people who saw him at the bars jumping up and down in a "depth jump" fashion so stoked up. I scratched my head and thought they mean "years ago" Donut not him nowadays probably because he has the Recovery Program. We went to Donut's September 28th, 2019 14th annual Celebrate the Art of Recovery Expo event. I also heard same behavior on a visit to the GMHS state park trail in parking lot from another who knew Donut on December 2nd, 2019 and he told me the same but years ago for his account but same description as I got in August 2019.

On Aug 28 3:25pm the text about the YH Fire is being hidden because of gross negligence mattered to me to see that text came from him. I agreed with him that this is a monumental task to attempt to have these YH Fire FFs and any involved to that fire to ensure the truths come out. I had been hacked on cell and pc when I returned from Washington, D.C. I went to rebuild it with a PDF I saved and that was no longer there. On August 30th, 2019, my contributing author worked so hard to build the posts to have it literally vanish in front of his eyes too. At that point, it seemed we would just toss the towel in and give up but God assured us it will be okay. Here we are.

I know at this point unadultered Spiritual Warfare was happening all around - some folks were almost even at the divorce stage - I was getting very ill. I even stayed away from home because I was contagious when I went through tri-therapy of antibiotics. Then we get told InvestigativeMEDIA is a harsh place. First this Summer with John Norman MacLean and now him. There is nowhere on the internet where you can freely go there and share on the Yarnell Hill Fire or even with name or anonymous place your Declaration or Affidavit. There is so many diverse personalities. I mean we could secretly all just email John Norman MacLean and let him sort it out since he feels he is the only credible one in all this, right? However, I bet you a higher percentage of people have anonymously or with name sent more private details to WantsToKnowTheTruth from IM in all this- That would be a funny moment if he made a book.

So by mid September, we learned the ones who tried to step up for us were rerouted in their field. That hurt me. They went to do the right thing and they were seriously affected the past few years. So others can do all this "illegal junk" and keep riding the gravy train, it Hurts me. I know when they tell me they are in these "sad" moments we all face the bi-product of them not communicating - during their "isolation" phases. To be number four on this entire planet that this person trusts me yet so many isolation times - it pains me. September 11 5:11pm he stated "I will make this right regardless of the situation with ..." then I hear cricket noises (quiet).

I feel for so many people who have come to me and told me their first to third degree accounts on the YH Fire. I also feel for the ones who came to me on all the other Arizona, California and Idaho fires. I know some signed disclosures and these would not hold up in court. I know some were told to shut their mouths and it eats you up, especially central coast of California.

I also have heard from many "YHF has too many people that know but have been sold the bag of lies and the normalization of breaking ROEs". Sept 13 9:05am a text to a contributing author - "You and Joy are peas and carrots." Funny part was at the same time I was very ill and I felt more like I was very smashed mashed potatoes and he was the yucky lumpy ones. Then the site was formally under investigation by this point, so good time so that I could recover. Same time the CA mishaps were happening and it gave the Forensic Weather nerds plenty time to watch rapid ROS 2019 CA Wildfires and how many of you FFs / civilians in 2019 faced shelter deployments or burn-overs? I am interested- call me up. You are not alone.

This Fall 2019 we all kept watching as well the continued behaviors of California fed engines with county hybrid engines ughs - we have to re-train some of you. I am sorry but it is the way I see it. Also, never feel like you have to say nothing just to keep your job. There are people watching and documenting. Like I said Forensic Weather is the future. There are the After Action Reviews ( AAR ) and Critical Incident Stress Management ( CISM ) that the WFs / FFs currently are lacking and please note you can always meet me in person and we can go over and make sure your stress are privately documented for archival purposes and if you need guidance what to do - reach me. We want to lessen the stresses of "Mayday" events-

You do not have to rely solely on USFS or Cal-Fire for your trauma aftermaths and if they do not offer those AARs / CISMs - I can help you get to the right place. Really. I know the difficulties it is to be the Forest Service and Cal-Fire as huge entities but I also know the complications to hear your fellow worker be in that spot the GMHS and others have been in ...

Sept 21 3:05pm, we were told by my friend - " You and Joy are my dear friends, much love" and September 28 9:01am they planned to drive out to see me for the November 5th Dinner event but by 3:19pm Sept 28 an odd text came to a contributing author "Is Joy going to die? Of all the people involved with this, she was caught in unfriendly fire, dumped and left to fend for herself, just like you and many more." ... the contributing author replied "Joy is a warrior." ( I was really ill and I did not need any people around me when I not only had that meds I was doing and dealing with the symptoms but I had a Woman in Fire Instructor being invited to my blog headquarters and I was already agitated and I am like ??? whatttt???? ) and when I heard the reply back "Jesus, I know that. But I am asking if she is well or not. The US gov't. shit on her, and everyone I care about ..."

The last time I was mentioned was Sept. 29 2:46pm, but I began to be so "focused" to all details to Caples RX burn in the start of October 2019. I mean, a forest that was slotted to be worked on within the decade because it sits in the middle of one of the largest watersheds in the United States of America. To watch the Forensic Weather experts watch this event go out of control and kept burning hundreds, if not thousands, of acres a day and they were naming it an escape ( cough, cough bullshit ??? ) then to watch the utility agencies label it a state of emergency for Seasons to come - ??? -

I hope Water experts jump on this investigation for the Sierra NV mountains which produces most of the water for millions of people all the way down to Sacramento from the Lake Tahoe area ( Did you hear me Norb ???) - it was burned on a red flag day and MANY MANY recorded rules had to be broken so for me it will be good to see this investigated on their terrible choices- How about when they warned to TAKE THEIR TIME and NOT burn it HOT-

WTF!? What RAW stations were they looking at over there? How about my Aircraft buddies- you wanna open up on the Caples RX Burn? Fixed Wings People? Call me. Any Safety Officers there? Let me guess, Jay Kurth who helped on YH Fire aftermath can just help out on the aftermath of this debacle in his own backyard, eh. Truly incompetence and disgusting! So come October 10, 2:46pm they declared it the 'Caples Fire.' I was dealing with the aftermath of a healing but also a real bogus distraction so I lost track on this fire due to Michelle and Michael and all that bullshit distractions.

According to what I saw in my recap of Caples RX Burn - October 3 personnel began ignitions and by the 4th reports of moderate difficulties with holding control lines and unfavorable conditions and yet they kept igniting well into the "observable" RED FLAG conditions. Looks like the fire management had an armada of local, professional help waiting for the call to help but "all is well" just like I heard on Saturday for the YH Fire when Sonny and I went to the Yarnell Fire Dept June 29 the 2pm "All is under control" Sonny and I was told - we need to ask to define "control" or WHO'S CONTROL??? ... right ....

Meanwhile ..."all is well" right ??? but why you ordering Interagency Hotshot Crews and Federal resources from far away on a "controlled burn" ???? Who is the El Dorado Forest Supervisor again? Was it Crabtree? Who the hell allowed a burn like that to take place in one of the important water sheds in California during a well documented and communicated red flag warning??? I hope they are held accountable at the highest possible levels.

Let us see those Prideful egos go to work again to hiding and omitting data to fit their narratives as tax paying citizens never learn about these current managers who in my opinion broke every rule, every checklist, every confidence and everything that makes public trust. Hi, Jay Kurth SME expert on YHF; remember me the girl you never met or interviewed on the YH Fire; the eyewitness ... as you can see my eyes are still witnessing ...just wondering were you called on the aftermath on your own backyard fire that was some bogus RX burn? Let us talk about the use of retardant in a class one watershed? Hey Sonny! Where ya at hiking pal... Retardant drop topic. Go to InvestigativeMEDIA to read all Sonny's topics over the years on just that.

“House cleaning must happen when the house begins to clutter and stink.”

And what better person than a housewife hiker to do just that.

I do not want to hear California Media / Journalism state they are understaffed and under-resourced bullshit-

This needs to be fixed.

I got rid of all the rugs to brush anything under -

"just saying"

It gets old when people over the years state "she cannot be ill if she does all that OR how is she that stout if she moves THAT much" ... You live my life and see my Aunt Ruthie (paternal side) (deceased) and her journey or my own father (deceased) or his brother (deceased) than you will get why I do what I do with keep on moving in some way with exercise. Than on my maternal side - My aunt and uncle are deceased and my other uncle has had one heck of a journey yet with the long transgressions of bad health he has the good Lord with him.

Maternal side, there is many of us with hereditary hemochromatosis (HH). Hereditary Hemochromatosis (HH) has been reported at a 20-200-fold risk of intrahepatic cancer. That is why I move and do high endurance type activities throughout my life. I am a strong believer we need to know who we are and it begins in your blood. Both family line/genetics and your actual blood type. I am O Positive which means a meat-rich diet. After being bit by that dog this year my tummy swelled up pretty bad and still a concern. I did antibiotic therapy in the Spring and as well the Summer 2019 (tri-therapy). What helped in this all is I know I am blood type O positive so I know I am prone to these type of concerns and I have caught a bacterial concern which contributed to the posts being delayed to be published. My apologies. I also apologize ahead of time if my timing of post offends anyone yet I wanted this out in August but I had the site investigated and it just was released for me to type on here so timing is just that and I have to keep staying the course because "much more" is due out besides this D.C. posts so I have to stay the course and keep this moving forward. I have alot of training in 2020. I will be away for the Holidays so I wanted to make sure this all was done in 2019 months ago but it is done now.

I was due to have my procedures December 16th, 2019 to biopsy for H-pylori since labs show it through 2019, handle polyps and check for gastric cancer or other GI concerns. My husband's last day of work was November 20, 2019 - being timed each shift with stopwatch and doing the job of four+ peoples work and etc. - so many either quit or have been let go and it appears the job's system wants humans to behave like machines and robots. My husband is not a quitter but he is also not one to be treated that way as last week they increased his job duties even more and spoken to inappropriately. I told him to take a leave of absence to visit his parents this holiday because his dad has been in the hospital. July 2010 was the last time our home saw a drastic shift in rhythm in a heavy negative way where I had to take on many jobs and God for sure pulled us through. We have "let go, and Let God" big time and see how this all unfolds. It would seem two without work is pretty bad yet with God "all things are possible" - right. I agree. Anyways, I did cancel the procedures for now - and getting some cash quotes from different areas.

This week I learned I have the symptoms I need to handle dealing with my health.

Since 1991, I have had advanced bilateral neuropathy in my lower extremities and my hands ( loss of signals normally sent (like a broken wire), inappropriate signaling when there shouldn’t be any (like static on a telephone line), errors that distort the messages being sent (like a wavy television picture). There is no known cure for bilateral neuropathy. The point of this area is no matter what ails you - without telling all my health stuff just move more. I learned November 25, 2019, I was re-tested by Dr Peyman Elison to confirm if a man who was struck by lightning who did craniosacral therapy on me October 10, 2019 healed me of an almost 30 year situation. Seems exciting, huh? Well, try using legs that laid with no feeling that long - learning balance and new types of stretching homework. Not always fun. Yet, very exciting to see time pass and I can feel my legs and hands and jaw again; sure. I am still greatly disappointed in the defamation phase Michael's partner left her bodywork for my path. She claims for her safety, Jesus wants her out of the mission yet if I were to play her sessions to the world - and let you all hear her sessions - not just me but so many could file for defamation on the content she stated in regards to the Yarnell Hill Fire. In my opinion, she not only owes me more clarity freely but many more folks. All I could do is either cause her legal concerns or just pray and give it to God for now. I will send her sessions to my life insurance agent though and this is a "pending" spot to my life and I will get back to it another time. I really want to run all her bodywork sessions with my legal team to see what I am allowed to release- I did "pause" my time with her mother because I have "shelved" this area.

-I had a "family/neighbors" type side kick who took my family and friends out for dinner/fun/luxury

box Sporting Events- Thomas J. Null who I met at Hallmark through the Habermans who took my

family and neighbors out all the time to eat/fun/games and my husband worked with Mr. Null as

well; (1994-2011 ) - he moved to be friend/security for the Andrew Sister in Vegas when he got his

cancer closer to his family.

- ( 1998-2010 ) I spent a good phase socializing with Scientists/Chemical Engineers, A-list celebs, Soap Opera Stars and Government people - dining, "going on set", hot-spotting/networking, clubs, dancing, golfing, hobby type stuff and etc ... ) (*New York* (*sorry*MP; it was sadly a social project experiment only between me and Jenn) /CA moments/1991 AD in NJ Gold's Gym/Wickenburg Landscaper Fireplace V family who rent/buy from Jerry and Judy Stone)

-Yet keep in mind I did spend good chunks in each Seasons; ( August 2011- August 2017 ) with logger miner

cowboy - Tex Harold Eldon Gilligan (Sonny) pioneering -"trailing" and learning how to live off the

land in many elevations and terrain. (who I met through Wickenburg teacher Katherine from her

page; senior match/looking for dancing partner) and we did a set six Seasonal years to pioneer the land at many elevations. (we still know another through online communications not in person and on InvestigativeMEDIA; he is currently "Charlie".)(I spent time with him on his Birthday December 10th 2019 in New Mexico and got to go to the spot he got shot by his dog) (Humorously known as the "Old Married Couple" (he's old)(I'm married) due to the Mormons humor but not the humor at all John Norman MacLean arrogantly and rudely insinuated / hinted at the Smokejumper Conferences years ago in a manner trying to achieve humor; very inappropriate distasteful verbiage and had zip to do with the Yarnell Hill Fire and if anything it came off he was disparaging the Yarnell Hill Fire Eyewitness Hikers and why? Makes no sense.)

Tex and I at the Wishing Well (Sept 2011)

-Very minimal communications; few texts in a five weeks span (*August/September 2017*), Grant Scott McKee (father to GMHS - Grant Quinn McKee) re-birthed me to "stay the course" when I was almost back up to 260# via a few text messages...gave me the strength and hope to keep going on and helped me re-gain "healthy" choices and better choices (met June 30, 2015, with Sonny at the Ranch House Restaurant in Yarnell Arizona (hike) , - no communications since yet I strongly believe he helped me keep the Faith and to do the *right things* and better exercise choices and stay with getting the facts for the 19 men and in August 2017 he saved me from making the wrong path of true destruction as I was going to destroy everything pertaining to the Yarnell Hill Fire because my frustration of how I have been treated early on by Central Arizona Fire and Medical ( CTRL F for joy on the link ) ( )and as well all the local fire departments...I just do not get "how" some of them FFs / WFs think "Carrying the Torch" means just moving forward and not sharing publicly in raw form about the most horrific weekend to so many peoples' life ... thank you,sir for saving me from doing some dumb stuff in my life. I will always feel God brought him for a second to angelically set me on the right path and stay the course because I was done after Sonny and I were off the trails with the YHFire. I never did get that devotions book Grant was gonna drop off because I began my school/conference trails and I was rude and emotional to him Fall 2017 because of an email Holly Neill sent saying my "supposed" friend I never met and clashed with did some bogus action and I was confused why she was sending it to me ??? and some people Grant knew did not like me writing about his art on IM and they stirred stuff up Dec 2017 with the help of person I clashed with on IM so I have not spoken to Grant since- I did see his passion for the Art world and a beautiful story: ) and Clayton Whitted's father Carl was a true blessing through this process with his amazing hugs when Sonny and I went to the Waffles an More to eat- thank you Carl. I do know quite a few of the GMHS loved ones and friends (to remain anonymous by their choice) as well as prior GMHS and I asked if it was okay to place all this out now because it just happens to be when I was "able" to get back on my site due to the investigation process and they were okay with it - I am sure it will offend some but it is not my intention just keeping on track to get this out so I can work on the next stuff that is in need to be out and is way past due-

-High ranking military man has been a huge help in me gaining tools and Wildland terminology and

he helped me birth the walking YOUTUBE vlog (2015- present) and helped me advance in Forensic Fire Weather knowledge.

-Occasional communication with someone "in" on the YH Fire and GMHS loved ones who names

me a "friend" (June 2018 - present)

-Occasional communication with someone "in" on the YH Fire and GMHS loved ones and was a

GMHS who names me a "friend" - I love that kid - you are the best. (Wheelies baby) (March 2019)

-Occasional communication with someone "in" on the YH Fire and GMHS loved ones who

cautions me about my journey and how they know much more - (June 30, 2013 and re-met June 30, 2019)

-Occasional and at times frequent- one who once was close to some of the GMHS widows who has been hurt by them who has shared their journey to me. Another person who I feel plays all sides and is still "in the loop" to a Widow but seems to like to "report" as if this is high school versus "real life" yet I cough it up to they are younger generation.

-Some of my current neighbors/community are my heart and soul and have been much a part of

this and are like family to me. I love them so much for their continued joy and Divine times they show me.

-January 2018- present, I have engaged in a training regimen that includes conferences, and that

will remain until the goal of truth is achieved and possibly there after. I have other contributing authors on here, (prefers to remain anonymous), has assisted in me learning the Wildland Fire Industry by encouraging and

assisting me to join certain schools and conferences I would have never been given the opportunities as just the "housewife hiker"- so thank you, sir. We often clash yet the person always taught me how important the "10 and 18" are to the Wildland Fire Industry as well in life. My old mindset has impeded my progress and I need to be more

willing to improve in order to learn even more.

-What is great about all these people that I named above are the ones that God shared in my life,

including those on my desert trails hikes, (e.g. Charles Casmir Lipinski, Jerry Sutich, Ronda

Carnes (2007-2008), Thomas Maiden "Snakeman," Lois Porowski, George Subers, Frankie Serros, and GDK. The thing I liked most about these people, was that I never had anything to prove, I had nothing to lose, and I was

always "just me." I was "alive" and "present" - embodied by natural and unnatural forces far